Phoenix Men is a fellowship that offers advice and support to heartbroken, lonely or ageing men.

Sick of being single and lonely

Subscribe To Our YouTube Channel

My Loneliness Story – By Stephen:

In life, there are two versions of people, the outgoing type and the anti-social type. Those who are the live wire of any gathering, I’m talking about those people that you can’t help but love their charisma. Then comes those of unfriendly aura that unwelcome people’s company, I am one of the many who ended up here. With everything that has happened in my life, I think I may be anti-social. Personally, I’m naturally introverted and mingling in social gatherings is not my forte.

In little words, I am not the kind of person that likes to be around a lot of people. I’d rather just be alone and thrive in my own space. Several people have asked me why I like to keep to myself; I’m still yet to think of a justifiable reason.

Remember those high school or college movies that involve guys that are loners due to their withdrawn personality and inability to connect with anyone? Well, I’m just like that. I’m just an average 31-year-old guy that finds it difficult to relate with people in general. By people, I mean every category of human that exists on earth, man or woman. I just can’t seem to strike any meaningful conversation or foster a good relationship with them. I feel like people don’t get me, and this makes me keep to myself rather than blurt out what goes on in my mind and end up sounding like a weirdo. Due to my introverted nature, I do not frequent bars or clubs. Hanging out is not something I fancy and when it comes to finding love on the internet, I’m not a true believer. No one should even get me started on my love life, I have toiled for love for as long as I can remember, hoping it will bring me happiness but in the end all it brings is heartbreak and pain.

Dating sites are just not cut out for me; I don’t believe I can find someone that matches my interest on such platforms. There are billions of people existing in this world, why is it tough to find someone just like me? I have not lost hope though, I have to believe or at least hope that there is someone here that I can relate to. At times, I just get so unhappy that I zone out from reality. People would have to tap me to zap me back into reality if they wanted to talk to me sometimes. I’m always looking for ways to forget my predicament and not feel the pain of loneliness by playing video games for long hours whenever I can or binge watch movies. It helps a lot but yet the feeling of loneliness is just too overwhelming. These days, to get out of bed in the mornings is a daunting task; I wake up and imagine waking in someone else’s body so I can just get through the day. Thankfully, I have not found solace in drugs and alcohol, but until when? I feel I may not be able to overcome this problem, but finding someone to relate to will surely brighten the dark cloud hovering over my life.

Comments Below…

Please Submit Your Own Story…

Please consider sharing your story with others suffering now. How you coped? How you felt? What helped? What were the circumstances that led up to your separation? How do you cope with loneliness? The more you can share the better.

Your story really does help others who are going through the same gut wrenching pain. Your story reinforces the fact that they are not alone in their suffering.

Submit Your Story Now – Thank You!

Comments Below...

Please Submit Your Own Story...

Please consider sharing your story with others suffering now. How you coped? How you felt? What helped? What were the circumstances that led up to your separation? How do you cope with loneliness? The more you can share the better. Your story really does help others who are going through the same gut wrenching pain. Your story reinforces the fact that they are not alone in their suffering. Submit Your Story Now - Thank You!

9 thoughts on “Sick of being single and lonely”

  1. Hi Stephen I typed “Sick of being single and lonely” in google and it brought me here. I’m 20 years old and I’ve been going out with this girl for over 2 1/2 years. We both transferred to the same college this semester. We’re both from NY. Everything was perfect between us the last 2 1/2 years but when we got here everything fell apart.

    She decided that just being with me wasn’t enough and wanted to join in with all the losers at school that sit around drinking and getting high. She was the most important person in my life. I have no other friends here at school. Not one. I am 1200 miles away from home. I have no one to talk to. This whole thing came as a total shock to me, I was not prepared for it and now I have nowhere to turn to.

  2. Hi Stephen, BTW, I also googled here and BTW I am also very lonely and love to have just a warm word of encouragement from someone. It just seems so bleak sometimes, like happiness or even contentment is simply unobtainable. My problem is like a lot of others: partially requited love but now permanent separation. I don’t know why I even get out of bed in the mornings.

  3. Hi guys i am lonely. I don’t like forums or online communities but this seems therapeutic.

    I am lonely and it is foggy outside and i keep smoking cigarettes even though i quit. I watched a great music video and i started crying. I looked at pictures of my ex. she is happy and living the life that we planned. Its been a year and a half and i am lonely. All other connections fail or i break them. I have a lot of friends and they think i am happy, but i think they are catching on.

  4. Hi Foggy, what can I say?

    Some place where feelings seems so familiar, but it’s just that after so much life, I still have to find a shoulder where to cry my pains, or a Heart where to feel warm and safe.

    Loneliness is a feeling so bad, so devouring, so consuming, it does hurt so much, and you do what ever to stop it and yet it keeps going, just like time itself, you can’t stop it, just hope for something to come straight out of nothing, but it doesn’t happen.

    You just dream of someone, some arms, some kisses, someone that notices you, that acknowledges your existence in this world, and you feel that, just by looking into her eyes or with a soft warm kiss.

    You just wish it so desperately, and in my specific case, I fight it back, let the darkness consume my heart, stop the need, the dreams, and just live on alone, not wishing, not hoping not waiting, so the pains ends when the love ends.

  5. You’re not alone Stephen. Being anti-social can result from natural causes or from events in your childhood but nevertheless, it being a part of your personality is just a way of showing that you are human. Show me someone without a screw loose here or there and I’ll show you an elephant with wings. In this world, there are introverts, extroverts and ambiverts. Being introverted can be tough, you may have been hurt from the dastardly acts of uncaring people that has led to you possessing that withdrawn personality. One can be extroverted, be the life of the party and yet still be lonely. Just find a balance because outside your comfort zone is where you can find magic!!

  6. Change is something that’s inevitable but there are some things that never change. Your nature is unique and as such you should just build around it. Engage in activities that will never make you feel lonely in your free time. Got a passion? Immerse yourself in it and you must not forget to listen to quality music too. This helps you to feel good about life and about yourself. Trust me, many men hate those despicable oestrogen tailored social media platforms called dating sites. Same goes for clubs too, so you’re not really alone. Just find what works for you. Stay happy brother!

  7. Everything in life is tailored to everyone’s nature, some may love parties while some don’t, there’s always adventure waiting for everyone. You are 31, still young. There’s so much to discover and gain from life, there are over 8 billion people on earth with women taking the majority of the population and you think there isn’t someone like you out there? Impossible! Life is no bed of roses but yet the struggle continues, you can’t just allow yourself to be taken willingly deep down into the pits of loneliness without a fight. Wherever you are, know that there are many like you battling loneliness, it’s not some deadly disease. With dedication to deriving joy and satisfaction from what life has to offer, you will persevere and all these will be behind you.

  8. Women today unfortunately just have too many very high standards now since they will usually go with men that have a lot of money. Gold Diggers are everywhere now.


Leave a Comment