My Loneliness Story – By Stephen:
In life, there are two versions of people, the outgoing type and the anti-social type. Those who are the live wire of any gathering, I’m talking about those people that you can’t help but love their charisma. Then comes those of unfriendly aura that unwelcome people’s company, I am one of the many who ended up here. With everything that has happened in my life, I think I may be anti-social. Personally, I’m naturally introverted and mingling in social gatherings is not my forte.
In little words, I am not the kind of person that likes to be around a lot of people. I’d rather just be alone and thrive in my own space. Several people have asked me why I like to keep to myself; I’m still yet to think of a justifiable reason.
Remember those high school or college movies that involve guys that are loners due to their withdrawn personality and inability to connect with anyone? Well, I’m just like that. I’m just an average 31-year-old guy that finds it difficult to relate with people in general. By people, I mean every category of human that exists on earth, man or woman. I just can’t seem to strike any meaningful conversation or foster a good relationship with them. I feel like people don’t get me, and this makes me keep to myself rather than blurt out what goes on in my mind and end up sounding like a weirdo. Due to my introverted nature, I do not frequent bars or clubs. Hanging out is not something I fancy and when it comes to finding love on the internet, I’m not a true believer. No one should even get me started on my love life, I have toiled for love for as long as I can remember, hoping it will bring me happiness but in the end all it brings is heartbreak and pain.
Dating sites are just not cut out for me; I don’t believe I can find someone that matches my interest on such platforms. There are billions of people existing in this world, why is it tough to find someone just like me? I have not lost hope though, I have to believe or at least hope that there is someone here that I can relate to. At times, I just get so unhappy that I zone out from reality. People would have to tap me to zap me back into reality if they wanted to talk to me sometimes. I’m always looking for ways to forget my predicament and not feel the pain of loneliness by playing video games for long hours whenever I can or binge watch movies. It helps a lot but yet the feeling of loneliness is just too overwhelming. These days, to get out of bed in the mornings is a daunting task; I wake up and imagine waking in someone else’s body so I can just get through the day. Thankfully, I have not found solace in drugs and alcohol, but until when? I feel I may not be able to overcome this problem, but finding someone to relate to will surely brighten the dark cloud hovering over my life.
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