Submitted By Jones:
Hello, I’m Jones. There is this particular thing that has been bothering me for a long time. I’m 38 and I moved to a new city a little over a year ago. Everything is lovely here except that I don’t really have a lot of people to talk to. When I say talk I mean like really let them know what’s up with me especially when I’m going through a lot and I’m really going through a lot right now.
I met a lot of people when I first moved to this city and we mostly hang around bars; drink, go home and meet at work the next day. We mostly do everything together so basically, they are my ‘friends’. As an emotional person, I love being open with the people I call my friends. That’s how I’ve been for as long as I can remember.
A few months ago I found out my girlfriend was cheating and it drove me crazy. I told my guys about it; that the break up was really weighing me down and I was depressed about losing her. They just laughed at me and said I was a pussy and that talking about feelings is what pussies do. So I just nodded, said I was only kidding and had a few drinks so they will stay friends with me because I didn’t know anyone else as I had just moved to the city.
I got home and I cried through the night. I picked up my phone and I tried to call my friends but I couldn’t. I felt so alone and depressed. I didn’t have an outlet of talking to people I can trust so I ended up staying indoors and relying on drugs. It has affected my work and life. I am really lost, alone and I don’t know how to get out of this.
I considered going to a shrink for help but I just feel like he/she will only listen because I’m going to pay him/her to. I could really use a friend to talk to as I’m always lonely and bottled up with sadness. Is it a guy thing not to share feelings or what they are going through? Please, what can I do? Do you guys also feel like this?
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